Possessing vs. Loving Others and Understanding Modesty
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Fr. Josh answers questions about the difference between possessing others versus authentically loving them, and how to properly understand modesty, and why how we dress matters.
Snippet from the Show
"St. Joseph loved Mary, but his love did not posses her, he reverenced the fact that she was a gift. The root of our clinging and possessing is ultimately fear."
Questions
Healthy Detachment
What does healthy spiritual detachment look like in the context of friendships and relationships with other people? I’m struggling with what it means to love others but also to practice detachment from them. If I’m detached from people, does it mean I love them less?
-Anonymous
Understanding Modesty
Hello Father Josh!
I'm trying to find a balance between modesty and female empowerment as it pertains to dress codes and clothing guidelines. I am a secondary teacher and coach both male and female athletes. I want to be able to guide both genders on how to balance this topic.
I watched a video on Instagram of a young woman voicing concern about her high school's dress code to the school district board:This completely blew my mind. She pointed out that other people, namely men, are sexualizing girls’ and women's bodies and basing the dress code on that. Why are others assuming boys can’t control themselves and why do girls/women have to change the way they dress based on others’ ability to control themselves? I can completely understand her argument and frustration.
On the other hand, I do believe that our bodies are God’s creation and should only be shared with our spouses once we are married and become one flesh. I also have always had classroom rules, and comfort levels, that everything is covered up from shoulders to knees no matter your gender. I don’t know that that is fair anymore.
Women shouldn’t be forced to dress based on other people sexualizing their bodies but there is also something to be said for dressing modestly and saving parts of yourself for your future spouse. Do you have any thoughts on how to find the balance and help guide the younger generation?
Thank you,
Laura
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Resources
- Submit your questions and feedback to Fr. Josh by filling out a form at www.ascensionpress.com/askfatherjosh
- Broken and Blessed by Fr. Josh Johnson
- Pocket Guide to Adoration by Fr. Josh Johnson
- Pocket Guide to Reconciliation by Fr. Josh Johnson & Fr. Mike Schmitz
- Ascension is pleased to offer our new and improved online bible study programs and sacramental preparation programs digitally to help you minister with flexibility. Go to ascensionpress.com to view all our offerings.