When we hear the words “Ten Commandments,” Bible study leadership probably isn’t the first thing that comes to mind. God has already given us his commandments, of course. But over the years, I’ve found that having a simple set of guidelines for a Bible study can make a tremendous difference.
I’ve led several Bible studies myself, and I’ve seen how these ten “commandments” can help create a place where people can prayerfully read Scripture, ask questions, grow in fellowship, and ultimately come to know the Lord more deeply.
And that brings me to the first—and, I think, most important—commandment.
1. Enjoy Yourself
Yes, really!
Leading a Bible study should be joyful.
As leaders, we can spend so much time preparing the material, thinking about discussion questions, organizing the group, and making sure everything runs smoothly that we forget we're supposed to enjoy this too.
At the Last Supper, Jesus tells his disciples, “These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full” (John 15:11).
That is what we want from our time together. We are opening the Word of God so that we can come to know him better. And as we grow in our knowledge and love of God, we also grow in our love for one another.
So before you begin your Bible study each week, remind yourself why you're there. You're there to know God. You're there to encounter his Word. The Holy Spirit is already at work in you and in the people sitting around the table.
Let yourself enjoy it.
2. Speak with Respect and Charity
One of the readings at my ordination was St. Paul's description of the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (see Galatians 5:22–23).
My bishop specifically focused on one word: gentleness.
I've never forgotten that.
When we're leading people in ministry, gentleness matters. People will come into our Bible studies with different experiences, personalities, levels of knowledge, and places in their spiritual lives. If we're going to grow together, we have to approach one another with humility.
St. Paul tells the Philippians, “In humility count others better than yourselves” (Philippians 2:3).
That is a pretty good examination of conscience for a Bible study leader. I have to remind myself regularly that I am no better than anyone else—and if I start thinking I am, then I'm definitely not.
3. Don’t Ridicule or Dismiss What Others Have to Say
Someone gives an answer and you immediately think, Well, that's not right.
Or somebody asks a question and your first reaction is, Everyone knows that.
Don't go there. Listen first.
Our words can do real damage, particularly when someone has worked up the courage to speak about faith in front of a group. Jesus takes our words toward one another very seriously (see Matthew 5:22).
That doesn't mean every answer is correct or that a leader should never offer clarification. But there is a tremendous difference between correcting something charitably and making someone feel foolish for having spoken.
Take the time to listen. Try to understand where the person is coming from. A healthy Bible study should be a place where people know their questions and insights will be treated with respect.
4. Come Prepared
As you lead the Bible study, do the work alongside everyone else.
Even if you've led the study before, go back through your notes. Read the Scripture again. Work through the questions again. Don't assume that because you've done it once, you already know what you're going to get out of it this time.
Scripture doesn't work that way.
The Word of God continues to speak to us, and you may notice something this week that you completely missed the last time you read the passage.
When leading, I also encourage participants to prepare—not because failing to complete Bible study homework is some great sin, but simply because they'll get more out of the discussion if they do the work ahead of time.
And, if possible, don't do all your preparation the night before. Or worse, the day of. I've been there too.
Give yourself time to sit with God's Word.
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5. If You Didn’t Prepare, Let Others Speak First
This one is pretty straightforward.
If you didn't get to the reading or questions that week, that's okay. Life happens. But allow the people who did prepare to begin the conversation.
As leaders, this is also a good reminder that we don't always have to be the first person to answer.
Our Lady gives us a beautiful model of this throughout Scripture. She listens. She receives. She “kept all these things, pondering them in her heart” (Luke 2:19).
Sometimes the best thing you can contribute to a Bible study is silence.
6. Stick to the Topic at Hand
Every Bible study eventually discovers the off-topic question.
Sometimes it's a great question! It's just not the question you're discussing right now.
One of my favorite solutions is what I call the parking lot. If a question comes up that would send the whole group in another direction, write it down. You can return to it later, ask your priest or deacon, bring it to your parish's faith formation leader, or find another appropriate place to get an answer.
That allows you to acknowledge the person's question without allowing the entire evening to become about it.
I've found this especially helpful when a conversation moves toward something controversial or something outside the purpose of the study. You don't have to enter into every debate.
Sometimes the right response is simply: “That's a good question. Let's put that in the parking lot and get back to what we're discussing tonight.”
7. Start and End on Time
This may sound like the least spiritual commandment on the list, but I promise you it matters.
If you tell people the Bible study lasts an hour and a half, don't regularly turn it into two hours.
People have families. They have work. They have children to pick up. They have responsibilities waiting for them. Respecting their time is part of respecting them.
There's actually a wonderfully dramatic biblical example of this. In Acts 20:7–12, St. Paul is preaching for quite a while when a young man named Eutychus falls asleep, falls from the window, and dies.
Don't worry—Paul raises him back to life.
Still, perhaps there's a lesson there for those of us who occasionally go a little long.
Keep an eye on the clock. If you have fifteen minutes left and three questions remaining, it's okay to say, “We have time for one more question, and then we're going to close in prayer.”
If some people want to stay afterward and continue talking, wonderful. But give the whole group a clear dismissal at the time you promised.
8. Allow Silence
This one is really important for me because I find it to be one of the most difficult.
You ask a question. Nobody answers. Three seconds pass.
And suddenly you're thinking, Okay, I'll answer it.
Don't. Give people time.
As a teacher, a deacon, and someone who has gone through seminary and graduate school, I can be tempted to jump in and give the answer. But as the facilitator, I'm the host. The participants are my guests. I want to hear what they have to say.
One of the Psalms I pray at Vespers in the Eastern Catholic Church says, “Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord, keep watch over the door of my lips” (Psalm 141:3).
Give the group the space of a Hail Mary before you jump in. Someone may simply need a few extra seconds to collect a thought or find the courage to speak.
You may be amazed by what you hear when you stop filling the silence.
9. Listen Without Interrupting
St. James tells us to be “quick to hear, slow to speak” (James 1:19).
I have that passage memorized because I need it.
Of course, facilitating a group occasionally means you have to step in. Someone may be taking fifteen minutes to answer a two-minute question. You can respectfully say, “Thank you for sharing. We have several other questions we'd like to get to, so if you could finish your thought, we'll hear from someone else.”
That's not being rude. That's facilitating.
However, our default posture should be listening. Don't spend the whole time someone else is speaking preparing what you're going to say next. Actually listen to them.
10. Keep Personal Matters Within the Group
This one is incredibly important.
A Bible study gradually builds trust. As people become comfortable with one another, they may share personal struggles, family situations, questions, or experiences they wouldn't share elsewhere.
Treat that trust as something sacred.
If someone shares a beautiful story and you think it could help others, ask: “Would you mind if I shared that?”
Maybe they'll happily say yes.
But don't assume.
And absolutely avoid gossip. Nothing will destroy the trust within a group faster.
You Don’t Have to Be the Expert
There's one final thing I want every Bible study leader to understand, especially if you're considering leading for the first time.
You don't have to know everything.
In fact, I don't want Bible study leaders to feel like they have to become the “answer person.”
If you're using an Ascension study, the teaching is already there. You have presenters who have done the teaching in the videos and written materials to help guide the group. Your responsibility is to facilitate the conversation, help people participate, and create an environment where everyone can encounter Scripture together.
If somebody asks a question and you don't know the answer, say so.
“I'm not sure. Let's write that down and find out.”
That's a perfectly good answer.
In fact, sometimes being willing to admit that you don't know something makes you a better leader. It reminds everyone that you're participating in the study alongside them.
Ultimately, these ten commandments aren't really about running a perfect meeting. They're about creating the kind of community where people can encounter God in his Word and encounter one another with charity.
So prepare well. Listen more than you speak. Protect people's trust. Respect their time. Be gentle with them.
And please—enjoy yourself.
We're opening the Word of God together. We're coming to know the Lord more deeply. We're growing in communion with one another.
There should be joy in that.
Want to explore more of Deacon John Harden’s insights on the Ten Commandments and learn how to lead a successful Catholic Bible study? Watch his full webinar from Ascension’s monthly Bible Study Leader Webinar Series!
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